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Find a great selection of birthday cards for the women in your life. We have a large selection of feminine birthday cards for girls and women featuring beautiful photography, warm illustrations and wonderfully funny cartoons that celebrate life.

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10 Diet Rules Funny / Humorous Birthday Card

by Nobleworks
Our Price: $3.50
Quantity:

Front:10 Diet Rules You've Never Thought of! 1. Food consumed when no one is around contains zero calories. 2. While baking - there are no calories in frosting or batter licked directly from the spoon or bowl. 3. Movie food (i.e. popcorn slathered in butter, candy, chocolate, etc.) doesn't count as food, it's entertainment. 4. Foods of similar color have the same caloric value: ie - white chocolate = mushrooms, pistachio ice cream = spinach. 5. Breaking cookies into small pieces neutrilizes their fat content. 6. Diet drinks negate the calories in chocolate when consumed together. 7. Frozen foods contain no calories as calories are a heat measurement. 8. Junk food is perfectly fine to consume as empty calories = no calories. 9. The calories consumed at a meal don't count when your date eats more than you. 10. Food with medicinal properties Brandy, Honey or Hot Cocoa, never count as calories.
Inside:Happy Birthday. Have another piece of cake!
Includes:1 card / 1 white envelope
Size:4.6x6.75 inches
Paper Stock:Recycled Heavy Cardstock
Prd Line:Talk Bubbles
Features:Recycled Paper
Item #:CD10190
Availability:In Stock
More Info:Made in USA.

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34 Long Funny / Humorous Birthday Card

by Oatmeal Studios
Our Price: $3.49
Quantity:

Front:Do you have this in a 34-long?
Inside:May your birthday cup runneth over!
Includes:1 card / 1 red envelope
Size:5x7 inches
Paper Stock:Recycled Heavy Cardstock
Artist/Credits:Teresa Burns Parkhurst
Features:Recycled Paper, Full Color Interior, Vegetable Based Inks
Item #:CD3114
Availability:In Stock

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3D Tip On Flip Flops and Pink Gems Teen Birthday Card for Her

by Designer Greetings
Our Price: $3.95
Quantity:

Front:Birthdays are a time to kick back!
Inside:Wishing you… a fun-each-minute, great-things-in-it, happy kind of day! Happy Birthday
Includes:1 card / 1 white envelope
Size:5x7 inches
Paper Stock:Heavy Cardstock
Prd Line:Designer Boutique
Features:Hand Decorated, 3D Tip-On, Gem Embellishment, Silver Foil, Insert, Full Color Interior
Item #:CD13931
Availability:Limited Quantity
More Info:hand crafted keepsake

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A Day Over Fabulous Birthday Card for Her / Woman

by Notes & Queries
Our Price: $4.25
Quantity:

Front:Happy Birthday - You Don't Look a Day Over Fabulous!
Includes:1 card / 1 white envelope
Size:4.9x6.8 inches
Paper Stock:Heavy Card Stock
Prd Line:Redback: Cloud Nine
Features:Pink Foil
Item #:CD13115
Availability:In Stock
More Info:Blank inside to allow you to add your own personal message. Printed on premium heavy card stock. Individually cello wrapped.

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A Meaningful Relationship Funny / Humorous Birthday Card

by Nobleworks
Our Price: $3.50
Quantity:

Front:WANTED: A meaningful relationship.
Inside:A meaningful card will have to do. HB.
Includes:1 card / 1 red envelope
Size:4.6x6.75 inches
Paper Stock:Recycled Heavy Cardstock
Prd Line:Hot Betty
Features:Jewel
Item #:CD3898
Availability:In Stock

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AARP Woman at Theater Funny Feminine Birthday Card for Her

by Oatmeal Studios
Our Price: $3.49
Quantity:

Front:You know you're really getting old when you're a member of AARP…
Inside:…and so is your first born. Happy Birthday!
Includes:1 card / 1 red envelope
Size:5x7 inches
Paper Stock:Recycled Heavy Cardstock
Artist/Credits:Scott Jensen
Features:Recycled Paper, Vegetable Based Inks, Full Color Interior
Item #:CD12538
Availability:In Stock
More Info:Made in the USA. Card and envelope are printed with vegetable-based inks on heavy stock recycled paper with graphics on both the inside and outside.

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Absolute Power Funny / Humorous Norman Rockwell Birthday Card

by Nobleworks
Our Price: $3.50
Quantity:

Front:All power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.
Inside:It's your birthday, more power to you.
Includes:1 card / 1 yellow envelope
Size:4.6x6.75 inches
Paper Stock:Recycled Heavy Cardstock
Prd Line:Rockwell Nobleworks
Artist/Credits:Norman Rockwell
Item #:CD3999
Availability:Limited Quantity

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Act Accordionly Funny / Humorous Birthday Card For Her / Woman

by Portal Publications
Our Price: $3.49
Quantity:

Inside:It's your birthday… act ACCORDIANly.
Includes:1 card / 1 red envelope
Size:4.75x6.65 inches
Paper Stock:Recycled Heavy Cardstock
Features:Recycled Paper, Full Color Interior
Item #:CD12941
Availability:In Stock
More Info:Made in USA. Printed on recycled paper.

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Age Is A Number Birthday Card

by Pictura
Our Price: $3.25
Quantity:

Front:Age is a number and mine's unlisted!
Inside:Here's to age and those of us who never show it! Happy Birthday
Includes:1 card / 1 purple envelope
Size:4.6x6.75 inches
Paper Stock:Heavy Cardstock
Prd Line:Dolly Mama
Artist/Credits:Joey Heiberg
Features:Glitter, Pink Foil, Spot UV Coating
Item #:CD13262
Availability:In Stock

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Aging Gracefully is a Virtue Funny / Humorous Birthday Card

by Nobleworks
Our Price: $3.50
Quantity:

Front:Aging gracefully is a virtue… so why is lying about your age NOT?
Inside:No lie, you look marvelous! Happy Birthday!
Includes:1 card / 1 white envelope
Size:4.6x6.75 inches
Paper Stock:Recycled Heavy Cardstock
Prd Line:Talk Bubbles
Features:Recycled Paper
Item #:CD10184
Availability:In Stock
More Info:Made in USA.

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Ain't My Car Birthday Card

by Pictura
Our Price: $3.50
Quantity:

Front:Well, no wonder the key doesn't work. This ain't my car.
Inside:Happy Birthday… Enjoy the ride!
Includes:1 card / 1 yellow envelope
Size:4.7x6.75 inches
Paper Stock:Heavy Cardstock
Prd Line:Eric Decetis Collection
Artist/Credits:Eric Decetis
Features:Embossed, Spot UV Coating
Item #:CD12640
Availability:In Stock

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Alien Body Snatchers Funny / Humorous Birthday Card

by Nobleworks
Our Price: $3.50
Quantity:

Front:Weekly world news. Alien body snatchers reject Paris Hilton! There's no place like home! Apparently Paris wasn't exactly the aliens' cup of tea.
Inside:Don't mean to probe, but how old are you anyway? Happy Birthday.
Includes:1 card / 1 blue envelope
Size:4.6x6.75 inches
Paper Stock:Recycled Heavy Cardstock
Prd Line:Weekly World News
Item #:CD3936
Availability:Limited Quantity

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Alternative Medicine Funny / Humorous Birthday Card

by Nobleworks
Our Price: $3.50
Quantity:

Front:Chocolate cake is the best cure for the birthday blues. It's called “alternative medicine”!
Inside:Take two slices and call me in the morning. Happy Birthday.
Includes:1 card / 1 yellow envelope
Size:4.6x6.75 inches
Paper Stock:Recycled Heavy Cardstock
Prd Line:The Humor Company
Artist/Credits:Randy Glasbergen
Features:Recycled Paper
Item #:CD6160
Availability:In Stock
More Info:Made in USA. Printed on Recycled Paper

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Always Be Yourself Unicorn Birthday Card

by Tree-Free Greetings
Our Price: $3.49
Quantity:

Front:Always be yourself, unless you can be a UNICORN - then always be a unicorn!
Inside:Hope your birthday is covered in glitter and magic!
Includes:1 card / 1 coordinating envelope
Size:5x7 inches
Paper Stock:Recycled Heavy Cardstock
Prd Line:Duirwaigh Studios
Artist/Credits:Angi Sullins, Silas Toball
Features:Recycled Paper, Full Color Interior
Item #:CD12425
Availability:Limited Quantity
More Info:Card and envelope are made from 100% post consumer recycled paper. Paper made with wind power. Green certified. Made in the USA.

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Always Enjoy Hanging Out Funny Feminine Birthday Card

by Oatmeal Studios
Our Price: $3.49
Quantity:

Front:We always enjoy hanging out
Inside:Maybe “hanging out” is a poor choice of words! Happy Birthday!
Includes:1 card / 1 red envelope
Size:5x7 inches
Paper Stock:Recycled Heavy Cardstock
Artist/Credits:Teresa Burns Parkhurst
Features:Recycled Paper, Vegetable Based Inks, Full Color Interior
Item #:CD11520
Availability:In Stock
More Info:Card and envelope are printed with vegetable-based inks on recycled paper. Printed in USA.

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Angry Birthday Bitch Funny / Humorous Birthday Card

by Nobleworks
Our Price: $3.50
Quantity:

Front:THE ANGRY BIRTHDAY BITCH She was a year older and she didn't like it one bit!
Inside:Getting older is a bitch. Happy Birthday!
Includes:1 card / 1 yellow envelope
Size:4.6x6.75 inches
Paper Stock:Recycled Heavy Cardstock
Prd Line:Sci-Fi
Item #:CD3987
Availability:In Stock

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Any Requests : Baby Playing Grand Piano Funny / Humorous Birthday Card

by Designer Greetings
Our Price: $3.49
Quantity:

Front:Any Requests?
Inside:Sorry... You can only turn 29 once! Happy Birthday
Includes:1 card / 1 white envelope
Size:5x7 inches
Paper Stock:Heavy Cardstock
Prd Line:Expose
Features:Spot UV Coating, Embossed, Recycled Paper
Item #:CD15582
Availability:In Stock

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Arm Flab Funny / Humorous Birthday Card

by Nobleworks
Our Price: $3.50
Quantity:

Front:I always knew the arm flab had a purpose!
Inside:Have a Flabulous Birthday!
Includes:1 card / 1 yellow envelope
Size:4.6x6.75 inches
Paper Stock:Recycled Heavy Cardstock
Artist/Credits:Mary Lawton
Item #:CD4051
Availability:Limited Quantity

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Arrivals & Departures Funny / Humorous Tom Cheney Birthday Card

by Nobleworks
Our Price: $3.50
Quantity:

Front:Arrivals: saggy boobs wrinkles stretch marks big ass cellulite varicose veins hot flashes mood swings Departures: smooth skin small sizes firm buns girlish voice flat tummy perky tits slender arms romance
Inside:Hope your birthday is turbulence-free!
Includes:1 card / 1 yellow envelope
Size:4.6x6.75 inches
Paper Stock:Recycled Heavy Cardstock
Artist/Credits:Tom Cheney
Item #:CD4068
Availability:In Stock

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Asian Beef & Snow Peas Dolly Mama Funny / Humorous Birthday Card

by Pictura
Our Price: $2.95
Quantity:

Front:Sayonara!
Inside:Recipe for Asian Beef & Snow Peas. Inside: Time to say good-bye to another year! Happy Birthday
Includes:1 card / 1 white envelope
Size:4.7x6.75 inches
Paper Stock:Heavy Cardstock
Prd Line:Dolly Mama
Artist/Credits:Joey Heiberg
Features:Thermographic Embossing, Glitter, Greeting Card Attached, Recipe Card
Item #:CD4310
Availability:In Stock

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Assorted Confections on Tray Die Cut Birthday Card

by Pictura
Our Price: $3.75
Quantity:

Inside:Wishing you a sweet and happy birthday celebration!
Includes:1 card / 1 purple decorative envelope
Size:4.6x6.75 inches
Paper Stock:Heavy Cardstock
Prd Line:Sienna's Garden
Artist/Credits:Nicole Tamarin
Features:Die-Cut, Embossed, Spot UV Coating, Gold Foil, Textured Paper
Item #:CD13392
Availability:In Stock

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Audrey Hepburn Dog with Pink Glasses Birthday Card

by Pictura
Our Price: $3.50
Quantity:

Inside:Get your Audrey on and have a Happy Birthday.
Includes:1 card / 1 pink envelope
Size:4.7x6.75 inches
Paper Stock:Heavy Cardstock
Prd Line:In Focus
Features:Glitter, Spot UV Coating, Embossed, Full Color Interior
Item #:CD13813
Availability:In Stock

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Babysitting TV Funny / Humorous McCoy Bros Birthday Card

by Nobleworks
Our Price: $3.50
Quantity:

Front:I know I shouldn't use it as a babysitter, but it's the only way I can get any housework done.
Inside:Happy Birthday. Let the games begin..
Includes:1 card / 1 blue envelope
Size:4.6x6.75 inches
Paper Stock:Recycled Heavy Cardstock
Prd Line:McCoy Bros.
Artist/Credits:Glenn McCoy
Item #:CD3964
Availability:In Stock

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Bad News Year Older Funny Birthday Card for Her

by Oatmeal Studios
Our Price: $3.49
Quantity:

Front:Bad news is you're a year older
Inside:Good news is so is everyone else! Happy Birthday!
Includes:1 card / 1 yellow envelope
Size:5x7 inches
Paper Stock:Recycled Heavy Cardstock
Artist/Credits:Scott Nickel
Features:Recycled Paper, Vegetable Based Inks, Full Color Interior
Item #:CD12212
Availability:In Stock
More Info:Card and envelope are printed with vegetable based inks on heavy stock recycled paper with graphics on both the inside and outside. Printed in USA.

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Ballerinas On Window Ledge Birthday Card

by Avanti Press
Our Price: $3.95
Quantity:

Inside:You are beauty, strength, and grace. HAPPY BIRTHDAY
Includes:1 card / 1 white envelope
Size:4.75x6.7 inches
Paper Stock:Premium Matte Heavy Cardstock
Prd Line:America Collection
Item #:CD11891
Availability:Limited Quantity
More Info:Made In the USA. The Dancers, New York City, 1936
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